Tuesday, 11 December 2007

Hello, Welcome To How To Skip School


  • Choose a disease to be "infected" with beforehand. Do your research. If you pretend to display common symptoms of a common cold, such as sniveling, coughing, and sneezing, it will seem more like you have a cold. If you shiver, make yourself vomit and go into fake convulsions, it will seem like a realistic case of Malaria. Be creative!

  • Control your coughing. This can never be stressed enough. Coughing too little may make you seem healthy enough to endure seven hours of non-stop schoolwork, but coughing too much may lead to the discovery that you're faking it. Take an acting class if necessary, preferably one on the finer points of fake coughing.

  • While there are several ways of being "found out" that you're faking, few are more foolproof than being taken to a doctor. Avoid this at all costs. Supposing the doctor is both competent and not easily susceptible to bribes, you will be discovered, and likely have your ass whooped by your father later.